Sitting Log #5 – Body + Mind + Routines

And then this entry here, which doesn’t count.

Done well:

Other thoughts:

I take care of my body the best when I am already feeling well. This isn’t necessarily a problem, but it becomes a problem when I am feeling not so well and stop taking care of my body.

This was why the occasional big trips in the pre-2020 years used to be so great. They were like reset buttons. Whatever I’d messed up body-rhythm-wise, I could fix along with the jet lag.

But alas, in the past 2.5 years, I haven’t done any big international trips. If there is one thing I want to remove from my life, it is bureaucracy and the accompanying hassle. So I didn’t travel at all. I lived like a woman peasant from the 13th century, never leaving the 5mile radius of her home. (I also work from home, so…)

The big (relevant) difference here is that a woman peasant from the 13th century would’ve been surrounded by nature (which is pretty exciting, especially after that fungi documentary I watched) and I am not. I think this is why even the activities that used to be reliable routines are breaking down.

My still-reliable routines include:

My half-ass so-called “routines” (but not really) include:

That’s about it.

So maybe what I need is a reliable set of evening routines? I think this blog is a good start. Blogging is healthy! It is different from completely-private journaling, because theoretically, everyone can see this, but very few will.

I strongly believe in public privacy. It is the kind of privacy you get in a big open park in a big city. (Another thing I haven’t experienced since 2020.) You can sit there and nobody will bother you. I love that about cities. Nobody cares about me. But theoretically, everyone could see me and care.

The idea that if something is put out there (like a blog post on the internet or a person at a big city park), anybody can come along and do whatever they want is utter bullshit. You know, like how pirates think that everything on the internet is for them to take. Or when people think that because you’re at a public park, they can assault you.

Something like this really happened in my neighborhood. A crazy person came along and assaulted a person at our local park. That same person also had a history of assaulting people at other places in the neighborhood. And yet, this crazy person got out on a $1 bail.

Yes. $1. It happened post-2020. That’s why. Because, safety for the people who go around assaulting other people in the park, you know? Because, how dare you expect privacy at a public park? There’s no such thing as public privacy! As soon as you’re out of your home (heck, maybe even inside your home), you should expect that other people could come along and hit you in the head. It’s your fault for thinking that people will leave you alone in public. The public is public. What else did you expect?


…and what do I have left?

Online public privacy.

Hopefully. Of course, just as it is perfectly possible to talk to a stranger at a park, I could talk to a stranger online. By public privacy, I only mean the right to not be bothered.

One can approach another. But when that person doesn’t want it, then one stays the FUCK away from that person. As simple as that. One does not go around harassing the other, one does not go around giving “feedback” to the other, and one most definitely does not go around assaulting the other.

I used to think this was common sense.

I don’t anymore.

Common sense can be waived with $1. Pretty much everyone I know has $1, so it might as well be that common sense does not exist.

So anyway, hopefully, soon, I will get my offline privacy back and return to a big city. I actually think that I will be safer in a big city, assault-wise. I have been fortunate that way. In my life, not a single person whom I asked for help in a big-crowd setting refused to help me. (ex: Asking someone for 50 cents at an airport because I want to use the vending machine, asking someone to help me haul my luggage off the baggage claim belt, etc.)

But when there’s no one to ask for help while some crazy person comes along and attacks me—that’s the worst. There’s only so much self-defense I can do without using actual weapons. I’m pretty small. Sometimes I get my shoes from the Zara kids’ section and my Converse size is 3. That’s right. THREE. Converse has an incredibly weird size chart.

So… yeah.

Anyway, writing is therapy. And this particular therapy is costing me $240 per 5 years for 10 ongoing sessions (blogs), of which I am not even using half. I would say that is pretty darn affordable.

So, maybe the cost of living isn’t so bad after all.

$240 for therapy that works? Brilliant!

$1 for waiving common sense? Splendid!

Maybe, with enough public-private writing therapy, I will one day forget that once upon a time, it was possible to waive common sense at whatever price at all.

#sittinglog #therapy #health #journal #archive2022Q2

P.S. Call me Ithaka. Everything I do is organized here.

P.S.2. “You can't edit or delete posts yet. We'll add this soon, and you'll be able to edit and delete your posts then — but be aware before posting.” on the first page. But it seems that I can edit this post?

P.S.3. Maybe it’s the comment post that can’t be edited or deleted.